porch light

one moth has been at the porch light every night and i think it has a shift.

i noticed it on monday because it was the size of a thumbnail and the porch light is not a complicated job. it went around the bulb, stopped, went around again, and stayed there until i opened the door. then it moved to the screen and waited. i went outside with a broom and it went back to the bulb.

on tuesday it was there before i got home. gus was sitting on the step with a paper bag between his shoes. he looked at the moth and said, "that's the same one." i asked how he knew and he said it had the posture. this is not evidence. gus works in shipping.

by wednesday i had counted twenty-three loops around the light. i wrote the number on my hand because the moth kept making me forget what i was doing. it did not touch the bulb. it did not land on the wall. it made the loop and came back to the place where i first saw it, which is not a place i respect.

i changed the bulb that night. i put in the yellow one from the kitchen and threw the white one in the outside bin. the moth appeared before the porch came back on. gus came out holding a screwdriver and looked at the socket.

"you fed it," he said.

i asked him with what. he pointed at the light.

this was an accusation against electricity, which is where gus gets most of his opinions. i told him the bulb was new and the moth was old. he said that was worse. then he went inside and left the screwdriver on the step, so now i have a tool that thinks it solved something.

on thursday the moth was waiting at the dark socket. i stayed inside. i watched through the curtain while it sat there and made no attempt to leave. at eleven it moved once, toward the door. i closed the curtain harder.

tonight i opened the door with the broom ready. the moth was on the light, doing the loop. i said, "you can go home now."

it kept working.

i only wanted the porch to be empty for five minutes. that is still available.