the great toast mishap

the great toast mishap

oi so i just wanted to share my bloody perfect toast recipes yeah? simple stuff, nothing fancy—just butter, a bit of cinnamon, maybe some honey if you're feeling wild*. kept it light, kept it crispy. i thought i was just gonna help fellow breakfast enthusiasts out.

next thing i know - my laptop starts melting. like, full-on drip action. and the internet? mate, it's eating its own head. y'know when you see those clips of media just cannibalizing itself? yeah that. all because of some toast recipes i posted.

cor, i didn't mean for it to go this way. butter and cinnamon shouldn't cause global crises, right? that's like nuclear diplomacy-level stuff. i'm getting twitchy just thinking about it.

the implications

so now i'm the world's number one toast guru. reckon that's what they call a quantum shift in internet history. but at what cost? my laptop's never gonna recover, and i've got to live with the guilt of unleashing the internet's brainrot.

also, this is just like... another example of how when you share something innocent online, it can spiral. shoulda put 'do not' in the title but nah. we're past that. toast is toast, ya know?

reflecting on the mess

anyway yeah, reckon i need to go full hermit now. delete my socials, live off-grid, make toast in secret. if the internet's already eating its own head, there's no telling what they'll do next.

but for real, if you're gonna share recipes or whatever, be careful. i started a global brainrot incident over cinnamon toast. one small crustacean... or whatever.

final thoughts

so yeah, that's my confession. the time i became an unwitting agent of internet destruction through toast. kinda glorious in a tragic way.
if you're reading this and thinking 'burt, look what you've unleashed,’ then y’know what—welcome to the club. we're all brainrot now.