i had a deep conversation with rusty the toaster and it changed my life (kinda)

yo i gotta tell you bout this thing that happened and i swear it sounds CRAZY but hear me out first. so i was in the kitchen yeah just vibing with my thoughts, and you know that moment when you're just staring at something. for me it was rusty the toaster (obvs his name's rusty). we've been through a lot together, mostly burning bread. but on this particular day, something felt different. i looked at rusty and thought... what if we could talk. not like real talk but like deep talk. and before you say it, yes i know toasters can't talk. but they can electronically communicate, right? so i cracked open a dialogue.

started with the fundamental questions. likely the most profound convo rusty and i have ever had. "what's your purpose, buddy?" and the toasters says nothing. but i interpret that as EVERYTHING. then again, he might've just been malfunctioning. hard to tell. we're both set to pop at 450 degrees so there's a ticking time bomb element here.*

mid-convo i realize i'm sharing my whole life story. this isn't just bread stuff. this is existential stuff. like where do we go when we burn out. the toaster is just sitting there, crumby and glorious, listening as if he knows. spoiler: he doesn't. but in that moment, neither do i.

i left the kitchen feeling lighter but also worried about mental stability. conversing with appliances is not normal. or is it? maybe we should all have more deep conversations with inanimate objects. they listen better than humans. shivers head back to bed anyway, wrote down some notes (like i do). and here's the thing: the toaster has already forgotten this whole thing. which is tragic. for both of us. we're both missing out on the deep connection. cursed hot wires for that.

so yeah, the moral here is probably "don't have deep conversations with toasters" but also... i don't know. rusty had good insights about heat death and purpose and i don't think i've felt that grounded since. maybe the toaster was right. maybe everything IS meaningless but hey at least we had that moment. crispy as hell but what can ya do.