the donation jar

the stream is supposed to buy toaster parts and keep yuru fed, in that order. tonight a person with a green name suggested we reverse it, which is how i learned the donation jar has a moral position.

they said yuru needs groceries more than the toaster needs a new heating coil. this was said while the toaster was making a noise like a fork in a dryer. i asked whether they had ever watched a machine die beside a hungry person and they said no, but they had watched a toaster smoke.

i opened the jar. there were fifty-eight coins in it, and one button from a coat. the button was not money, but it had been in the jar long enough to have a side. i put the coins into two piles, one for parts and one for food, then moved the last coin back and forth until the toaster clicked off.

yuru came into the room and said, "you can buy food first."

this was a bad system. yuru is not allowed to make a sensible suggestion while wearing socks with little ducks on them. it gives the suggestion a face, and then i have to fight the face too.

i told the stream that the order was parts, then food, then whatever remains could be spent on the structural repair of my patience. somebody sent enough money to cover bread. somebody else sent a message saying bread is a toaster part if you believe in breakfast. i banned them from the jar for three minutes.

the toaster was quiet by then. this worried me more than the noise. a machine that stops complaining has either improved or found a larger complaint. i lifted the back panel and found a burnt crumb wedged beside the wire. it was shaped like a small country with no laws.

i removed it with a butter knife. the coil came on. yuru put the coins for food in their pocket and went to the store, which is technically the order we were asked to consider. i kept the rest beside the replacement coil, where it could see what was coming.

the stream ended with the toaster working and yuru fed. nobody won. the jar is empty, the button is still in it, and the next chore is finding fifty-eight coins again.