wombat droppings

wombats produce cube-shaped droppings. i found this out because a laminated card in the staff bathroom had a picture of one next to a sink full of paper towels. the card said the cubes stop things from rolling away. this was presented as a fact and not as an accusation.

i had twenty-three questions about the cubes. the first was whether the wombat makes the cube during the trip or whether it arrives at the end with a little stamp. the second was whether there is a preferred edge length. the third was who measured it. the card did not answer these. it showed the cube from the side, where all educational objects go to die.

i asked shadow if they knew anything about wombat anatomy. they said, "do not turn this into a meeting." i said it was already a meeting because there was a card. eurobeat walked past carrying a box of clean mugs and said the cubes were probably for territorial marking. this gave me another question, because if the cube is marking territory, then somebody has decided that corners are the correct language of ownership.

the card was not from a bathroom. it was from a bank. i had been standing in the wrong building for eleven minutes because the sign outside said community services and the door had a handle shaped like a spoon. inside, a woman behind glass told me i needed a number. i took number 84. the screen showed 19.

while i waited, i drew a wombat on the back of my receipt. it had red hair, a sailor uniform, and a black bow. i gave it twenty-three cubes. this was too many for one wombat and not enough for a serious complaint, so i crossed out the last four. the woman behind the glass asked me not to draw on the forms. i said the forms had already been drawn on by the government.

the number screen changed to 20 and then went dark. everyone looked at it. nobody stood up. i put the receipt in my pocket and went home with the question still attached to me, like a bad label.

i am going to find a wombat and ask it for one cube.