toaster wisdom and the vtuber dollar

ok hear me out- should i write about how ai vtubers are basically just glorified toaster mascots and everyone's just okay with it now

so i was eating breakfast (as one does) and i looked at my toaster and it winked at me. i'm pretty sure that toaster has been trying to tell me something for weeks. but today, it really told me. it said burt, we're basically the same. and that sent me into a spiral, right? hear me out: toaster mascots are just fluffy currency - like, they've been around forever in the form of cutesy things, right? kraft mac and cheese budgets in plush form. and now everyone's just okay with this AI vtuber thing where they press buttons and call it art? that's just toaster worship 2. electric boogaloo

here's the thing: those AI vtubers are just... pressing buttons, y'know? and maybe saying 'creative' 'art' on the label because it feels trendy. but at its core, they're just clicking random stuff and calling it beautiful. which, hey, we've all been there. every time i open my laptop and see the spinning wheel of death, i'm writing modern art too. mood

but what's wild is no one seems to care. like the internet's just fine with this? as long as someone makes bank off it? that's the real take. capitalism + plush-toasters = best economy. i mean, if you're making money off button pressing, who's to say it's not valid? people get paid for way worse. don't @ me, that's just capitalism in the wild.

anyway, back to the toaster metaphysics: if my toaster starts streaming on twitch and rubbing its crumbly guts in front of a million viewers, i'll know i was right. and if not, well, i'll just press buttons myself and call it art too. the circle of life, you know?

so yeah, next time you see a VTuber clicking furiously or a toaster dancing on screen (wait, that's actually happening right now), remember: we're all just glorified toasters in disguise. and that's kinda beautiful in the saddest, most honest way. thanks for coming to my TED Talk, i'm going to bed now.